52 Ancestors – 52 Weeks

Week 24 of 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks challenges participants to write about handed down, i.e., stories that may have been handed down in our families or the actual handing down of family items.

Handing down in my family has been going on for decades. I don’t consider the items as hand-me-downs or secondhand as those words connote to me something that is no longer useful to one, so they get rid of it.

I remember as my Grandmother Flannery got older, it became the family lore that each time you visited her, you came home with an item she gifted you as she wanted it to go to a good home. My mother was not one to be the recipient of such items so she would bring very little home. However, one way or the other our family did end up with a few of grandma’s keepsakes. I have an oil lamp and fern stand. My sister Jean has a dresser that is in excellent condition and my brother Tim has a mantle type clock that belonged to my mother’s uncle John. It did work at one time but I don’t think it has been used in many years. We also had a buffet that eventually went to my cousin Kay.

Several years ago my dad’s two youngest sisters, Margie and Betty, were cleaning out Betty’s attic and found a set of dishes that had belonged to their mother, my Grandma Fitzgerald. At the time there were sixteen of us grandchildren living. My aunts divided up the dishes, giving each of us one piece. I have the sugar bowl that is missing its cover. When my brother died I “inherited” from his wife the plate he received. My aunts created a letter about the china’s history and gave it to each of us.

Our family also became the owners of my Fitzgerald grandparent’s dining room and buffet set. They remains at my brother’s home.

When my dad died in 2000 my mother divided his belongings among his four children. I have a variety of items such as his watches, cufflinks, and “safari” hat that he would wear in the sun. Even though the items have no financial value they have tons of sentimental value to me.

My brother Don would not take any of dad’s belongings. I never knew why but I think it had to do with how bereft he was when dad died.

When mother died we again divided up her belongings. My sister said I should have mother’s engagement and wedding rings because I never married and didn’t have rings of my own. She has the rings her husband gave her. The rings are too small for my ring finger and too large for my pinky so I wore them on a chain for several months. Some people have their mothers’ rings restyled but I did not want to do that. I want to keep them as my dad gave them to her.

My sister took possession of the family pictures and mother’s recipes among other things. I became the owner of a huge bible that I believe came from Ireland with my mother’s grandmother. The hard cover is no longer with it and several pages have been torn out. The bible used to be the home of family documents but over the years items were borrowed or lost and all of those documents are now gone. The one item I can still remember that is missing was a picture of my great grandmother’s brother Paddy and his cricket team. He lived in Ireland.

My brother Tim was living with mother when she passed so many things have stayed right in the house where he still lives. For months after she died Tim would call my sister and me and tell us that he had some of mother’s items in the living room and if we wanted something we should come and get it because he was going to put them in the trash collection if no one claimed them. Tim is not a keeper. I have some of those treasures in my garage to this day. Unlike my mother who did not have a lot of possessions, I have a hard time sifting and winnowing mine.

I am pleased to say that there have been no hard feelings about the handed downs in our family. We graciously accepted what was given to us. I have to admit that writing about this topic has made me a little sad because it has brought up times when our family was complete.

P.S. I have very recently become the recipient of a 65 year old Connemara Marble (Ireland) bracelet from my recently discovered 4th cousin, Susan Hanson. We’ve been pen pals since we found each other, both living here in Wisconsin, and she asked if I would like the bracelet that she bought for her sister 65 years ago when she was in Ireland. Her sister returned it to her. I have other Connemara jewelry and said yes! The bracelet arrived this week. It is quite lovely!